|
| Haven't posted a blog in ages...but here's one that i posted on Facebook/MySpace...
---------------------------------
I wasn't ready to say goodbye to you, yet. But it came suddenly.
Today, my dog, and one of my best friends, passed away. Kissimee. You all might remember her as the one who was always coughing, or who would growl at you when you came near me. She was the fluffy white one. The maltese.
A playful ball of fluff is what she was when she came to us. I was in the 3rd grade or so. She grew up with me, but didn't get much attention. I have...well...had 4 dogs. So there's alot of competition for attention. My chihuahua, Bitsy, was already kind of "my dog", so I gave her the most attention. Then Asta was born, and she got all of the attention cause she's small and cute-like. Then we got Pansy, who gets ALL the attention came in. The only one who gave any attention to Kissimee was my father. But after we got Pansy, no one paid any attention to her.
One day...I don't even remember when...or how long ago...I guess right around the time we got Pansy...I saw her and thought, "Why does nobody like this dog?" No one paid attention to her anymore...but she was always trailing behind the other dogs. The memories are so blurry to me, now, though. I can't remember if she was smiling, or if she was a sad dog. I started giving her attention, and petting her when no one else would. She grew a liking to me and started following me around everywhere. I laughed it off. What a funny dog.
I would wake up in the morning and she'd be by my side...and I was wondering why it liked me so much. I still don't know. Why didn't it just go back to my father? I only showed it a little attention. But everywhere I went, it was there behind me.
It began to cry when I left...or get excited when it heard a car door outside. It waited by the door, anxious, excited...just hoping that it would be me who would step through that door.
Then I realized how much this dog loved me. We became attached to eachother, and she then became "My Dog". It was the only dog who wouldn't run away if it didn't have a leash outside. It would walk around, and want me to walk with it. This was exciting...because...none of my other dogs have ever done anything like this.
She had a way of talking to me. She would growl and bark, but not in a mean way. She would be trying to talk to me. Like, "Hey! Look at me!" or "I'm hungry!" ... ... ...
Not soon after she became my "Man's Best Friend", she became ill. She would cough alot, or wheeze. No biggie, she's just sick, right? She'll get better.
It only got worse, so I became sad, knowing this dog would soon pass away. The things running through my mind, I clearly remember, because it was in Health class with Chris Lew. I thought... "I wish I got to know this dog earlier...I wish I could have grown up with it by my side always."
I even created a character in one of my stories based on her. It's not even hard to tell which one it is if you saw it...it's directly based on her.
Me and my father had taken her to the vet that had newly opened up no less than a block away from my house. They diagnosed her with a heart disease. I don't remember what it was called...but it wasn't really curable. The disease made her heart enlarged, so it pressed against her lungs and made it harder for her to breath. That's why she was always coughing. Although it was not curable, we were able to get a medicine that would minimize it. This medicine was very expensive, though. We weren't even sure if it was helping her, though. She was said not to have long.
But here we were, two years later. She's been by my side the entire time. I wonder sometimes if she was just being strong for me...or not giving up because she wanted to protect me. This dog really wanted to protect me. You should know if you've been to my house and gotten near me. She would bark or lunge at you. Of course, she couldn't do any damage, really...but she tried.
It's funny...she never really liked any of my friends. The only person she grew to like was Jay. The only people who were ever able to pet her was Judith and Amy Pham (I think).
Through everything I did...those Narutowned videos? All my drawing...listening to music...playing videogames...even hanging out with friends...
She was always there beside me. She had places she liked to lay around the house...and I can list every single one. She would come when I called her name.
If I was in the bathroom, she'd wait outside the door. She just...was always there.
She celebrated this past Christmas with me. She liked to lay on my Christmas presents cause they already had my smell on them.
I really don't remember what day it was...but it was after New Years, i'm sure of that. We knew one of our dogs was sick.
I would call out her name, but she would not come. She would lay there. She didn't have that smile anymore...her eyes seemed sad. She didn't cough anymore, even. When I came home, she wasn't at the door to greet me...but when I came around the corner, she was laying there...but her tail was wagging because she was happy to see me.
My mother said we would have to put her down cause she was in pain. She hadn't eaten anything in two days. So we took her to the vet, ready to let her go.
I didn't think I would cry...I really didn't. But it wouldn't stop coming. I would look at her, wrapped up in a blanket in the waiting room. She looked up at me...and she smiled. It struck my heart with such a pain...that she would not know that she would be put to sleep. I couldn't stop.
The vet diagnosed her and found another major problem. She had an infection, and that was the cause of her not walking around and just laying there. Our hopes were revived...when he told us that we could help her out. We bought her medicine and everything.
We took her home...and helped give her her medicine. My dad bought her baby food and helped feed it to her. She hadn't eaten in a while, and I don't know why she couldn't...but she enjoyed this food. You could tell cause she kept licking her lips. She smiled at me alot. She barely walked, but she would do her best to always be in the room that I was in. This was two days ago.
Yesterday we took her back to the vet and her fever had significantly gone down. She was getting better! The doctor said her infection would burst, and after that got healed, she would start to be able to walk more and feel better.
There's was so much joy in my heart. I took her home and spent some time with her...but of course i went to hang out with people and whatnot. Her infection DID burst, so that was good.
She got up in the night and walked to me to tell me she had to go to the bathroom. She could walk! She used the bathroom and came back inside. We were going to take her back to the vet to get her infection checked out in the morning.
I woke up a little late, but it turns out the vet just said to keep the area clean and bring her on monday. I'm glad she's okay and getting better.
Me and Roland Moreno had bought some ramen, so I was cooking it. She followed me into the kitchen and laid there like old times watching me cook. She just looked up and smiled at me. I then went to get on the computer and check some stuff. She came in here and got up on the chair like she used to and sleep.
I would generally check on her, but she was gone. I looked around, but she had been laying in the bathroom lately, so I checked there. She was just hanging out by the shower. She looked up and smiled at me. I went and petted her.
All my friends wanted to go out to eat at Chili's...so I went to find Kissimee and say goodbye. So I went into the bathroom, and looked in the mirror and checked my hair. I saw her tail and back feet sticking out from behind the toilet. I called her name, "Kissimee!", but no response. She didn't respond. I went to check if she was breathing...but she wasn't.
She died.
At first I was okay...but it didn't even take 10 minutes for it to hit me. She wasn't following behind me...or talking at me... or barking at my friends. She's not there anymore. She won't be there anymore. Ever.
I didn't really want her to be cremated...I wanted her to be buried.
My dad had put her body in this chest with the pillow and blanket she had been sleeping with lately. Her body was so heavy and lifeless. I didn't know what to do whenever I looked at her and she wasn't moving. I put this stuffed bunny she always carried around with her next to her body.
My dad called me when I was with my friends to tell me they decided to bury her in our backyard in the garden, where she used to play and eat the tomatoes off of my mom's plants.
I don't usually write notes, but I wrote this one to just think back on things. It hasn't even been half a day and I miss her already. I miss her so bad. Even when she couldn't walk, I miss seeing her smile at me. I've never had a dog as good as her. I wonder if I ever will again. I came home tonight...and she wasn't there to greet me. I miss knowing she was there beside me.
I never knew I would care this much. I often though to myself if I 'd be sad when she was gone. I didn't know it would affect me this much.
But she lived a good life. She was happy. I just wasn't ready for her to go.
It makes me sad and wonder if my other dogs even know she's gone.
I'm at a loss for a conclusion to this note, if you even read this far...but...
Here's to you, Kissimee. A wonderful friend, family member, dog. You'll always hold a special place in my heart. If there is a place where animals go when they die...I know you'll be watching over me...or waiting for me. I love you, anf there'll never be another like you.
Rest in peace, Kissimee Valle. 01.05.08
I'll miss you.
| | |
| Happy birthday to me, guys!
| | |
| 
http://the-magicbox.com/0609/kh2fm2.jpg (link if you cant see the pic)
Sora?! Kingdom Hearts 2: Final Mix seems interesting...but too bad it'll never come out here. =\
On another hand, Kingdom Hearts 3 should be good. Wonder when that'll come out. 5 years from now? X_X
| | |
| Maaannn i'm tired. My whole schedule's been thrown off since school started. =_=
| | |
|
